| Friday, October 23rd, 2009 |
| 1:24 pm |
farmer joe
they live in their holes and fill them with coals but nothing comes close to the warmth of being a child and they farm all day long putting the seed in their arm tearing up anything close to the warmth of being a child then they drag soles six feet under exposing souls whored for plunder like pirates sailing the sun for the warmth of being a child but i spend my days like a tick sucking drugged blood with my prick and i feel like im dying in the winter like an old man |
| Monday, October 19th, 2009 |
| 11:10 am |
i had a dream last night that was odd. i was in a stainless steel room from wall to wall, floor and ceiling. it was just cold enough to frost the metal, and my flaccid skin. there was a small light in the back of the room, an incandescent 40 watt bulb swaying gently, oddly in a windowless room. i made out a mirror between the shades of cleanliness that the stainless steel offered. i could see my face. i was bleeding from my nose and mouth. i choked red all over the clean...and my dirty. i tried to find something to clean up with, but i found nothing. there were rows of unending godly polished sinks with their perfectly dry drain holes and their unperfectly lack of faucets or knobs. so, i walked the line, bleeding into each one as if i was five again, running down the row of urinals pissing in each one before my bladder gave up or someone came in the bathroom. but at least i slept |
| Friday, November 2nd, 2007 |
| 1:30 am |
girls are all insane. i dont know why they think the way they do. it just baffles me sometimes |
| Wednesday, August 15th, 2007 |
| 10:42 am |
ive had mono for the last 2 weeks. yeeeesh. im a fucking wrecxor |
| Thursday, June 28th, 2007 |
| 1:37 am |
man my friends page is fucked up. i cant see anything new, and its hard clicking on all the names. bah |
| Sunday, May 6th, 2007 |
| 4:05 am |
yuhyuhyea twilight zone is awesome. |
| Sunday, April 29th, 2007 |
| 5:24 am |
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| Tuesday, April 24th, 2007 |
| 1:49 am |
i think i finally found out why youre livin in my heart its cause youre feelin real pretty when your sittin in my dark its like a choo choo train reaction when its comin off the track i know your feeling real easy cause theres no way back |
| Saturday, April 14th, 2007 |
| 8:54 pm |
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| Friday, April 13th, 2007 |
| 3:49 am |
woah. absolutely breath taking, but you cant convince a man of something he already knows |
| Saturday, April 7th, 2007 |
| 5:53 pm |
sometimes i pretend that im dead. ill pose on the bed as if it's a comfy casket and close my hands like a fox trap on my chest. i stop the noise of breathing and accept every persons fated poise of someone who was something but now has been digested into nothing. when ive had my fill of life at such a dreafully dead pace, i bite gently at my knuckles as if they were your shoulders, neck, and face. it is an adrenaline shot of lust which brings me back from an overdose of dread. but there will always be something that makes me pretend that im dead. |
| Saturday, March 10th, 2007 |
| 7:20 pm |
i need a drink. im gunna go get a couple whiskey sours tonight. maybe ill go to some unique bar that i havent been to yet or something. i have never wanted a drink so badly to calm my nerves out. its just been stressful lately, and i havent had time for anyone or anything. i work at the mall now, and i think ive broke my neck several times swinging my eyes around. its okay, but only stupid people go to the mall. its the most expensive place to shop, and after going to cordova a few times, it really is overkill to take a step inside. oh, i cant stop narrating my thoughts when i post anything. it makes me feel like ive lost some originality or creativity, but then i realize 'hey nothing has really happened in the last couple months to give you inspirtation' because usually something with a negative impact will feed me special creative juice.. boxes. i have no clue. fuck i want a drink and a joint |
| Friday, March 2nd, 2007 |
| 11:15 am |
saturday is my day off. i really dont feel like dealing with work today. my ear hurts cause ive got an ear infection that hasnt healed completely, and the pressure is just a bitch. all i do is sweep and mop, so its not hard. eh just talkin shit out |
| 11:13 am |
so andrew and his girlfriend are in jail and i have no money to bail them out (need 100 to get his gf out then she has like over a couple thousand in her bank account, too bad jails dont have atms). and i have to work so i cant hustle anything up. he called me at 4am two days ago and i couldnt go back to sleep cause i know he is going to withdraw from methadone in jail and i wouldnt want my worst enemy to be in jail let alone be withdrawling. its a long story and i cant find anyone that will put up 100 |
| Tuesday, February 27th, 2007 |
| 11:31 pm |
i fell asleep at 6pm today. why, why why did i do that? i mean ive got what 2 hours and 15 minutes before the infomercials slaughter the channel selection. ill be up all night now. and now its even less time because ive been stoned watching tv. ive been trying to do the right thing lately. not so much right as realizing how good i have it sometimes. i have no room to complain about anything in my life except what i fail to accomplish, so ive been trying, and it feels good. i cleaned my room (i mean like dusting and sweeping not just whipping shit into my closet and play the ole out of sight out of mind game untill oh shit i dont have anymore clean shirts so i check the closet and now i have to put every single piece of clothing in the dryer to dewrinkle it but of course one at a time as i decide to wear them), changed a tire on my truck that felt like it wasnt holding pressure therefore eating my gas like a fat bitch who cant drive and doesnt understand the concept of a two-lane road, and last but not least, i helped use this de-weeder metal claw thing on a three foot rod to shove it in the ground where weeds are and twist with all my might to remove the weed and the roots, which resulted in the top of my hands hurting (i dont undertstand that because in no way did the top of my hands do a goddamn thing, if anything they should be smacked in the face for not helping me). also, ive been taking out the trash...it makes me feel like a man. usually, i would just shoot dope and lay in bed all day. things are looking up |
| Friday, February 23rd, 2007 |
| 3:07 pm |
i just want to be a janitor. i just want a mediocre job, and i want a mediocre life. i dont want any downs, and i dont want any ups. |
| Sunday, February 18th, 2007 |
| 2:47 pm |
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| Monday, February 5th, 2007 |
| 3:33 pm |
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| Tuesday, January 30th, 2007 |
| 2:14 pm |
'not to be' is the answer to your question |
| Sunday, January 28th, 2007 |
| 2:47 pm |
buzz
i dreamt i was a cossack, and i was galloping straight towards you but when i got there, you turned into a bird and made me sick with your flew i pulled the cold through my nose like it was cocaine. it vexed my lungs into a coughing fit that could of been easily mistaken as a dog barking. i yelled at the street with purely reckless intentions, but it soon became apparent that i was going to have to let the street have what it wanted, so i emptied my stomach on command. i dont usually drink, and i especially dont drink and walk. i wanted to feel sorry for myself, but the utter nakedness of realizing youre a pathetic piece of shit doesnt help at all. |
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coldphlegm's journal
